Monday, June 30, 2008

Conditions of Nikkah

Assalamu-Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu,

Todays post is really short but very very important.

A lot of girls out there don't know that a girl can set many conditions for the conditions of marriage which the boy she's getting married to has to fulfil.
I would urge the girls to think very carefully about the consequences of the conditions before they set any them.

One very important condition on the nikkah papers should be that a girl has the right to a divorce.
I know for a fact that in the asian continent the men cancel the entire section that gives the girl the right to divorce,(on the nikkah papers) or to set any conditions!

The following link is to a fellow blogger's page where she discusses how men use the threat of divorce against their wives to make them do things!

Here's a comment from Umm Attiya on the same page, and believe me it's very very good piece of advise for any girl going to get married...
Hope it makes you smile the way it made me smile ;)

Anonymous; Kinda on the same topic, the imam of my community told a story the other day:

A grandmother was giving her soon-to-wed daughter and her intended husband some advice. She told the young woman to try not to get angry with the new husband, and to take up some hobby like crochet to get her mind off it
if she did. The grandmother also told them not to keep secrets from each other. So the young woman and the man married and lived together for 60 years with not any arugument between them, and they kept no secrets from each other.

Eventually the wife became very ill and was near to death, and she and her husband decided to put their affairs in order. She called her husband to her bedside and told him she had something to tell him, something that she had kept hidden for all the years of their marriage. She directed him to get a small box from the closet and open it. He got the box and opened it in front of her. It contained 2 small crocheted doilies and $25,000.

The husband remembered the advice the grandmother had given them years ago and tears came to his eyes as he looked at the two doilies. He said to her, "You made these doilies when you were angry at me, and there are only two." The wife looked tenderly at her husband and said he was right. Then the man looked at the money and said, "But what about this money? Why have you kept this secret from me for 60 years?" The wife put a gentle old hand to his face and said, "This is the money from all the other doilies I sold in the past 60 years.

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