Conditions of Nikkah

Assalamu-Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu,

Todays post is really short but very very important.

A lot of girls out there don't know that a girl can set many conditions for the conditions of marriage which the boy she's getting married to has to fulfil.
I would urge the girls to think very carefully about the consequences of the conditions before they set any them.

One very important condition on the nikkah papers should be that a girl has the right to a divorce.
I know for a fact that in the asian continent the men cancel the entire section that gives the girl the right to divorce,(on the nikkah papers) or to set any conditions!

The following link is to a fellow blogger's page where she discusses how men use the threat of divorce against their wives to make them do things!
http://organicmuslimah.blogspot.com/2007/12/my-glass-of-water-or-your-divorced.html

Here's a comment from Umm Attiya on the same page, and believe me it's very very good piece of advise for any girl going to get married...
Hope it makes you smile the way it made me smile ;)


Anonymous; Kinda on the same topic, the imam of my community told a story the other day:

A grandmother was giving her soon-to-wed daughter and her intended husband some advice. She told the young woman to try not to get angry with the new husband, and to take up some hobby like crochet to get her mind off it if she did. The grandmother also told them not to keep secrets from each other. So the young woman and the man married and lived together for 60 years with not any arugument between them, and they kept no secrets from each other.

Eventually the wife became very ill and was near to death, and she and her husband decided to put their affairs in order. She called her husband to her bedside and told him she had something to tell him, something that she had kept hidden for all the years of their marriage. She directed him to get a small box from the closet and open it. He got the box and opened it in front of her. It contained 2 small crocheted doilies and $25,000.

The husband remembered the advice the grandmother had given them years ago and tears came to his eyes as he looked at the two doilies. He said to her, "You made these doilies when you were angry at me, and there are only two." The wife looked tenderly at her husband and said he was right. Then the man looked at the money and said, "But what about this money? Why have you kept this secret from me for 60 years?" The wife put a gentle old hand to his face and said, "This is the money from all the other doilies I sold in the past 60 years.

Quick 3minute make up

Assalaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu.

Many times we have to run out of the house but want to look good before we do.

Here is my favourite as it works well for a girl in hijaab.
1. Apply moisturiser all over face and neck.

2. Apply compact powder on T-zone and under eyes.

3. Apply a quick light sweep of blusher on apples of cheek.


4. Apply quick sweep of mascara on top lashes only.

5. Apply lip gloss in a natural colour or one that's subtle and you're all ready :)

The ability to choose

Assalaamu alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu,

It's sad for me to watch my friend rely on her husband or family to make decisions for her, and if she's given a choice she's unable to make a choice.

She's one who's decisions have always been made for her by her family and she had to obey whether she liked it or not. Soon she had given up makin choices because there was on point in doing so anyway.

Please ladies teach your children to make their own decisions from a small age. Reward them for makin the right decisions. Guide them and tell them about the consequences if they've made wrong ones but please let them make the decisions under your guidance.

Listen to them when they speak and keep an open mind. Especially when they're in their late teens remember they think of themselves as adults and want to be treated the same way.
Also remember that they actuallly may be correct in their way of thinkin. If they're not then gently remind them me what's they're doing wrong through quoting hadith or Quraan.

It's also very important to build ur child's confidence. Inshallah the above will also help the children grow in confidence.

Let me know what u think.

Jazakallah,
Wa Salaam

Diamond hidden in a piece of coal

If you've ever thought of where a diamond comes from, you've probably been amazed at the fact that it is found inside a piece of coal!

A diamond is found in nature in rocks which have come from very high pressure and temperature zones below the surface of the earth by volcanic activity.

Roughly 49% of diamonds originate from central and southern Africa, although significant sources of the mineral have been discovered in Canada, India, Russia, Brazil, and Australia. They are mined from kimberlite and lamproite volcanic pipes, which can bring diamond crystals, originating from deep within the Earth where high pressures and temperatures enable them to form, to the surface.


Diamonds come in many different colours ranging from crystal clear to black.
Diamond color can occur in blue, green, black, translucent white, pink, violet, orange, purple and red, though yellow and brown are by far the most common colors.^[8] "Black," or Carbonado, diamonds are not truly black, but rather contain numerous dark inclusions that give the gems their dark appearance. Colored diamonds contain impurities or structural defects that cause the coloration, while pure or nearly pure diamonds are transparent and colorless. Most diamond impurities replace a carbon atom in the crystal lattice, known as a carbon flaw. The most common impurity, nitrogen, causes a slight to intense yellow coloration depending upon the type and concentration of nitrogen present
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diamond

The black diamonds are known as Industrial diamonds and are used in diamond-tipped drill bits and saws.

Allah protects these precious gems in a case of black coal, in the same way a woman in a hijaab and wearing an Abaya is like a diamond protecting herself from the eyes of all except those who deserve to see her in her full beauty,these being her family members and those mentioned clearly in the Quraan.

My words are not too good but I hope that you understand what i am trying to say, and I pray that Allah Guide all the Muslim girls out there on the right path, and help them in their struggle to be good Muslims Ameen.

Teen Pregnancies

Assalamu Alaikum

This morning as I was reading the news, I came across this disturbing article.

Teen ‘pregnancy pact’ has US town reeling in shame

WHEN a 15-year-old girl at Gloucester high school in Massachusetts discovered she was pregnant earlier this year, she displayed no trace of fear or concern. Shown the results of her pregnancy test, she responded: “Sweet!” She then rushed off to tell her friends.

The girl was among a group of up to 18 Gloucester teenagers who may have made an apparent “pregnancy pact” that has stunned this decaying fishing community

The notion that girls as young as 14 might deliberately try to become pregnant has embarrassed school and health officials. It has also ignited a row about what exactly the girls were up to, and to what extent the religious beliefs of this predominantly white and Catholic corner of New England may have encouraged an unprecedented spike in teenage sexual activity.

to read the complete article refer to:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article4187548.ece


A few years ago the "norm" for high school students was to get involved in drugs... is this this what the students need to do to feel accepted by their peers?
What about the parents? What are they doing about it?
Or are the teenagers of America so "liberated" that they can do whatever they like without even thinking of the consequences of their actions?

What about the welfare of the resulting children?
They are just born into single parent families, how is this goof for the child? A child needs both his/her parents for a proper upbringing!

Are the boys /men who get these girls pregnant responsible for what they have done or do they just walk away, leaving the girl to take care of herself and the baby??

"Teenagers who enter into pacts are feeling neglected and estranged from their parents, Lieberman says. "The teenage years are fraught with challenges to their fragile emotions, so parents need to stay closely involved with their teen's life." http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Story?id=5215182&page=3

As the above article states it is children that are neglected by their parents that end up doing such things... Perhaps the parents should be more understanding towards their children, and unwrap themselves from their busy lives to give much needed attention to these teenagers, be friends to them and guide them to make wiser choices by telling them the consequences of their planned actions.

One such student wishes she had the chance to change things here what she says:
Alycia Mazzeo, who became pregnant at 14 and now has a seven-month-old daughter to look after, said she wished she had a chance to lecture her schoolmates about the realities of teenage motherhood. “It’s not all cute things like dressing up your baby,” she said.

Also, Films such as Juno and Knocked Up have been blamed for romanticising a social evil, as has massive media coverage of Britney Spears and her family. Spears’s actress sister, Jamie Lynn, gave birth last week after becoming pregnant at 16

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article4187548.ece


Alhamdu-Lillah As Muslims we do not have to face such problems if we live according to Shariah, and they rights of the children are secured.
The girls and boys are responsible for their deeds, I'm not saying that Muslims don't do such things, the ones that have weak Imaan do that and in doing so make other Muslims look bad!

Let me know your opinions

Wa' Salaam

To Pluck or not to pluck?

Assalamu Alaykum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu

This is a very sensitive subject and this is what i know about it from various sources.

In the majority of the Arab states the ladies are seen with beautifully shaped eyebrows, and heavy make-up. Indeed it is so beautiful to see even on a lady wearing a Niqab.

Once I heard from someone that it is haraam to shape the eyebrows, and I used to do it myself, infact I learnt how to do it for others too, and used to do it.
My search for the correct guidance lead me to the following:

The following Fatwa issued by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, who states:

“The word used in the Hadith is nams in Arabic, which means plucking the eyebrows. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) considered plucking as distorting the creation of Allah. This was the practice resorted to by prostitutes in the time of pre-Islamic jahiliyya (ignorance) and it is still used by women of loose morals.

However, scholars who have studied the issue in detail have concluded that if a person’s eyebrows are unusually thick or unwieldy, then he or she can straighten them out. This is not considered nams or plucking. Allah wants us to look neat and tidy, and by trying to appear neat and tidy we are not distorting Allah’s creation, rather we are only enhancing it.”

Dr. Muhammad Bakr Isma`il, Professor of the Exegesis of the Qur'an at Al-Azhar University, adds:

“It is known that plucking eyebrows is forbidden. However, some jurists permit light shaping of eyebrows if they are thick and hairy in a way that they harm the eye or appear so wide and thus displease the husband. If it pleases the husband that they are shaped lightly, there is nothing wrong in doing this just to please the husband. As for extreme shaping or plucking, it is not permitted.”

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?pagename=Islamonline-English-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503547124


Another view of the scholars is as follows:
Firstly:

It says in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah (17/133): “It is not permissible to remove the hair of the eyebrows because this is the namas (plucking) for which the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed those who do it, and it is a kind of changing the creation of Allaah, which is the action of the Shaytaan. If a woman's husband tells her to do it, she should not obey him, because it is a sin, and there is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator. Rather obedience should only be with regard to things that are good and proper, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said.”

Secondly:

It is permissible to remove any hair from the face apart from the hair of the eyebrows.

It says in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah (17/130): “The evidence that it is permissible for a woman to remove hair from her body is the basic principle which states that it required for her to adorn herself for her husband. There is no evidence to suggest that this is not allowed, apart from the prohibition on al-namas (plucking), which means removing hair from the eyebrows.”

And it also says (5/197): “What is the Islamic ruling on removing hair that grows between the eyebrows? The Committee replied: It is permissible to pluck it, because it is not part of the eyebrows.”

And Allaah knows best.


Islam Q&A (www.islam-qa.com)


The evidence for that is the hadeeth of ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) who said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) say: “Allah has cursed the woman who does tattoos and the one who has them done, the woman who plucks eyebrows (al-naamisah) and the one who has it done (al-mutanammisah), and the one who files her teeth for the purpose of beauty, altering the creation of Allaah.”

(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5931; Muslim, 2125)

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/9037

Reading all the above made me stop shaping my eyebrows, at first they repulsed me very much, but then I thought to myself I am doing this solely for Allah and Inshallah Allah (SWT) will reward me for this.

I hope this helped the ladies out there!!!

Let me know what you think.

Wassalaam

the begining the opening chapter

Assalaamu alaikum
The first and most important chapter of the Quraan is Surah Fatiha which itself translates to the opening chapter.

It starts by praise to Allah the sustainer and cherisher of the world.
Indeed we have lots to thank Allah for. Especially things that we take for granted such as our eyesight. Just imagine he one day a grain of dust gets in your eye it can be very painful, and if it causes any damage to the eye we risk loosing our sight. So every minute that you have small blessings from Allah such as your eyes being well and/or having no major physical deformalities we should thank him.

Allah is very forgiving and most merciful.
We may commit sins ask for forgiveness and yet still do the same sin again and yet again ask for forgiveness. Allah is so merciful he forgives again and again. There is no excuse for any muslim not to ask for forgiveness and at the same time we must ask allah to protect us from making the same mistakes again.

Lord of all the worlds.
Our universe is made up of countless planets, galaxies, stars. Planets that we haven't even heard of yet. Allah is the sustainer and cherisher of all.

Allah do we worship and His help we seek.
We should not worship anyone else nor ask for help from any other god.
Often when we're in trouble we say 'God help me' the God we should ask should be Allah and Him alone.

Show us the straight way, the path tread on by the people that You have guided, and not on the path that leads us astray..
Our constant asking to be shown the right way will inshallah help us from doing the forbidden things.

This is just my way of interpreting this surah others might have other views.

May Allah bless and guide us all. Ameen

My first blog

Assalamu Alaykum

This is my first blog, I'm just a simple person, not too good with words, seeking Allah's (swt) guidance.

I'd also like to share some of the knowledge that I have with others Inshallah.
I once read somewhere that the best way of living forever was to pass on knowledge and not simply die with it...

This is it for now I guess...

Wassalaam